Sometimes we don’t even realize that this ugly world is among us. But unfortunately it is, in this unenforceable.

Let me tell you one of my days:

Today we were heading home from a busy day at shopping (Yes not work, trying to buy weakened specials when the world is a “a” hole”), so then we stopped at the local PUB. Only to rest on our way to home.

The prices and the crowds are always the best in town. Or it was, as I thought.

The place where we friends to meet.

But today,… as we were sitting and enjoying our own company and old friend / “an crew” walked up. We were familiar from a past to put it lightly.

As we had a good time in the conversation, I had to have over spoken myself and then she decide to hit me on the nose and then I hit to the ground. (BANG)

My wrist was so saw of the fall and I did tried to get up. But I HAD this “Ridiculous” don’t hurt anybody policy; Don’t hurt anything, I was Useless. I properly frowned and thought, “What the fudge?”

My amazing friend then saw my ridiculous attempt and knew. She then punched them all to the ground like a “Johnny Depp” movie.

Who is the criminal or the “wrong person” in this circumstances?

As this is properly debatable.

I remember waking…

I remember waking up and then just looking up and then gasping for YOU…

“All that, I had was the toughs of you”.


I always wanted you too tell more, tell the story, more…

But what kind of satisfaction would that have made.

I thought : “Perhaps there she never ever got away..”


I was wrong, IT WAS NOT ME. But I did not know that, then.

And then you left…

101 Questions need answering…

My challenge to you is, you can ask any question and get an answer.

You can post your question, only if there is no harmful speach in the comments.

101. If you are diagnosed with bipolar, would you date another bipolar? Or only people not diagnosed?

100. How did you, rather are coping in a epidemic going longer than a year? Scared, scaring, traumatized?

99. .

Sing little birdy sing

I wake up early in the mornings and I lie awake just listening. Just listening to all the different kind of birdies dancing, singing and hungry for their moms to feed them or just placing herself next to them.

All different kinds of them… So sweet but on the same time its uncomfortable and anoying as I cant sleep but I still enjoy them. I somehow it sometimes reminds me of how I used to be.

My best friend died las week. He was bipolar. He did a lot of things and it all got to much for him and his body to handel.

We get so busy with our own lifes that we do not always see the scream for the others person or persons that need help.

I always heard of only woman being depressed and bipolar. Run to the laugher place, not away from it.

I just want to let the world know that men can be bipolar. In one year it has been two of my male friends that were hospitalized for bipolar depression. It might be mostly of the epidemic. But its real.

South Africa – has got a Rhythm


Every day I have the privilege to drive into this township. It is located in Middelburg, Mpumalanga. Not having much these children are making the most of every moment and they feel save to play outside at night. It blesses my heart just to see them save and playing outside.

I was told that where my sister lives, they have two different walls surrounding their complex to protect their kids from the outside world and for any brake ins or for whatever matter. Its sad to know that children these days wont get the joy that me and you had growing up to play save outside.

Trafficking kids are going viral in South Africa. Please have a look at this website below and the statistics. It scares the living shit out of me.


A child goes missing every five hours in South Africa, according to figures released by the South African Police Service Missing Persons Bureau for 2013. This adds up to a total of 1697 children. Fortunately, according to Missing Children South Africa’s statistics, 77% of children are found. Sadly, this still leaves us with at least 23% of the children not being located.


Hello August my old friend. Its so nice to see you again.

The seasons and the years are changing, yet it all feels the same. If it all changes why do I still feel this way.  Why cant I change like the seasons.

I am learning from my current mistakes that what I did wrong in the past that I am still doing it all the same. You would think that it would have made a difference on my current decisions.  But no it didnt.

Mistake is an old friend of mine. It never seems to leave my side and it always sticks with me. Perhaps I should be glad that something is sticking by me.

It is a hard pill to swallow these mistake, but its a realization. Seasons change but it all stays the same.

Last night was one of the looniest nights that I have had in a very long time. I cried myself to sleep while suffocating my sorrows into my pillow. I wanted to be alone but yet when I was alone it felled so lonely. I am always making a appointment with mr disappointment.

I dont want to be disappointed anymore. I dont want to feel lonely. I need trust, true love and respect. She says she loves me but I dont feel loved. I dont want to point out how she should love me. I want it to come naturally. Just say you love me all the same.

Free adrenaline, also known as epinephrine

Adrenaline, also known as epinephrine are released in our bodies when we get scared or frightened.

When frightened, your body floods with the hormone adrenaline. This skyrockets your heart rate and blood pressure.

Even thou I have researched and learned a lot about spiders, it always amaze me when one runs over my hand unexpectedly.

The adrenaline is undescribable.